And for a free trial, no less! If this isn’t laughed out of the courtroom and dismissed with prejudice, we’re all screwed.

Public flogging of a child is to be executed by the nearest authority figure upon any misbehavior, outburst, or disrespect perpetrated by, or suspected to be perpetrated by, said child. If their innate shortcomings are not beaten out of them at the earliest opportunity, they are bound to develop into unemployed hooligans.

Including women??? Well I say! It’s only proper to publicly flog men. Everyone knows that!

If you’re worried about unauthorized access to the physical machine, you could always just do disk-level encryption instead or store the app’s data in something like a Veracrypt virtual disk. They’d still be able to access the data if they go through your OS/user, but wouldn’t pick anything up by accessing the drive directly.

Nothing short of E2EE can truly stop someone from accessing your data if they have physical access to the server, but disk encryption would require a targeted attack to break, and no host is wasting their time targeting your meme server. I seriously doubt they’d access it even if you had no encryption at all, since if they get caught doing that they’d get in a heap of legal trouble and lose a ton of business.

It’s a criminal offense now, so if the officer is having a bad day you get to spend the night in jail. Max fine of $500